Counselling for Expats

Category: ‘home’

So you’re spending a lot more time with your teens?

We know that conversation is important, and sometimes it’s hard to find the time and the place. Mealtimes work, if that’s a thing in your home. Car drives work well too, but not so much under present conditions. So does walking the dog and washing up together (or loading the dishwasher!)… A calm bedtime might the perfect time for you and your teen. Once you’ve found whatever works for you, what to talk about? Here’s a list of 15 questions which might lead to valuable, constructive conversation. They come from a 2018 article on the LifeHack website: for the full article, click on the heading below.

15 Questions To Ask Your Kids To Help Them Have Good Mindsets

1. What five words do you think best describe you?

2. What do you love doing that makes you feel happiest?

3. What do you know how to do that you can teach others?

4. What is the most wonderful/worst thing that ever happened to you?

5. What did you learn from the best/worst thing that’s happened to you?

6. Of all the things you are learning, what do you think will be the most useful when you are an adult?

7. If you could travel back in time three years and visit your younger self, what advice would you give yourself?

8. What are you most grateful for?

9. What do you think that person feels?

10. What do you think your life will be like in the future?

11. Which of your friends do you think I’d like the most? Why?

12. If you could grow up to be famous, what would you want to be famous for?

13. How would you change the world if you could?

14. How can you help someone today?

15. If you could make one rule that everyone in the world had to follow, what rule would you make? Why?

‘Where are you from?’

This short video from the BBC beautifully explores what in expat communities is the absolute norm. The look on many kids’ faces as they hear the question, ‘Where are you from?’ says it all – you can see them trying to work out what it is you want to know. Where was I born? Where are my parents from? What does it say on my passport? Where do I live? Where do I feel at home? My own kids are both French and English, were born in Viet Nam and now live in Africa. We see how hurtful it can be for them when someone dismisses them as ‘not fully British’ or ‘not proper French’ – and they don’t have race thrown into the mix. They are full and empathic human beings who belong in the world – perhaps the very notion of ‘nationhood’ needs revising…